At this moment, one year ago....

I am sitting on our bed with Penelope napping right next to me and I realized that at this very moment, one year ago, I was also sitting on this bed, in labor with the baby we had not yet met!

Laboring in our den, complete with pillows and birthing ball!

After a premature trip to the hospital in the morning, we came back home and I labored with P all day, until we headed back to the hospital around 6 PM. While I was terribly disappointed that I was only 1 cm dilated when we went to the hospital the first time, in retrospect, I am glad that much of my labor was spent at home. The first stage of labor was definitely the most difficult time-wise...it took the better part of about 17 hours to get through that first stage. And, if I had stayed at the hospital, chances are that the staff would have offered pitocin which would have, more than likely, necessitated an epidural and all of the interventions I really did not want. It is also a nice memory...being at home for the majority of the laboring process...among our things, with our dogs, and knowing our friends and neighbors were nearby. It's how I imagine women have given birth since the beginning to time...not hooked up to monitors or in sterile rooms. Of course, there is sometimes a need for such monitors and sterile rooms. Next time, I know that I can wait even longer before heading to the hospital...that is...if we don't just have the next baby here, at home. But that is a topic for another blog post!

Right now, I prefer to reflect upon the 24 hours of labor it took for Penelope to get here and how I seemed to find, within my inexperienced birthing self, a stockpile of strength and determination I never knew was there. I have often, particularly in those sleep-deprived, early morning, ready-to-tear-my-hair-out moments, only had to think about that stockpile to know I can get through just about anything now, having made it through the labor and delivery of little Penelope.